TEENTITAN SONGS
by Shekron Kaizar
Summary: Theme song spoofs plus story. Star gets abducted and Raven catches a cold, right before their first live blues performance for charity run by the Penguin.
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer: I do not own teen titans or the theme song!

After a messy party last night, Robin starts sweeping up the mess. Robin couldn't quite get the warped fan Larry's tune out of his head. It was sort of catchy! He picks up the broom. (He plays air guitar and does the guitar sound 'Da dad a da daa' etc.)

When there's trouble you know who to call  
Teen Titans!  
Beastboy 's corny jokes are really a bore  
Teen Titans!

When there's evil on the attack  
They'd best get moving or else get the sack  
Cuz when the world needs heroes on patrol  
Teen Titans GO!

With their superpowers they unite  
Teen Titans!  
Of course they have problems so sometimes they fight  
Teen Titans!

They've got the bad guys on the run  
Until one turns round and uses a gun   
Cause if they fight they'll all end up with holes  
Teen Titans GO!

Teen Titans GO!

If you get Star angry, she will jump and shout  
Cyborg's really sheen   
Insult Raven and you will get a clout  
I don't like eating all my greens  
eating all my greens

T-E-E-N! T-I-T-A-N-S! TEEN TITANS! LET'S GO!  
T-E-E-N! T-I-T-A-N-S! TEEN TITANS! LET'S GO!  
T-E-E-N! T-I-T-A-N-S! TEEN TITANS! LET'S GO!  
T-E-E-N! T-I-T-A-N-S! TEEN TITANS! LET'S GO!

Teen Titans GO!  
Teen Titans GO!  
One, two, three, four, GO!  
Teen Titans!

"Did I just see what I thought I saw?" says Cyborg mirfing as they wake up to the noise.

"Did I hear what I just hear?" laughs Beastboy.

"Did I just sing what I sang?" says Robin a bit embarrassed. "Or do you think you guys can do better?"

"Get the maracas! I'm going in!" smiles Beastboy.

To be continued?


	2. Other chapter

Disclaimer: I do not own teen titans or the theme song!

As altered from Puffi Ami Yumi lyrics

"Right! Queue in the music! I'm going to rock the place! Oh yeah!"

"Earthquake?" says Starfire confused, waking up and emerging from her room.

"There will be if he starts singing!" says Raven, who had a late night.

"Oh come on! I'm not that bad!" says Beastboy. "I think I'm pretty good!"

"Ahh! My ears are burning!"

"Do YOU think you can do better then?"

"Oh! A musical talent contest! May I join in too?" smiles Starfire. "Maybe we can all sing as a team group! That would be farily really good!"

"Looks like we have a little band going here!" smiles Cyborg, grabbing out a large band set from his shoulders. "Booh-yah! I'm ready!"

"If YOU think I'm going to start singing…!" says Raven.

"Oh don't be such a party poop!" says Beastboy, fitting on his trendy shades.

"Right!" says Robin, twirling his guitar. "Let's see how we go!"

…

ONE TWO THREE FOUR

…

(Beastboy)

When there's trouble we don't go to the mall  
Teen Titans!

(Starfire)  
We're there on the double, we rarely usually fall  
Teen Titans!

(Beastboy)

When there's an itch right on the back  
We'll be there to give it a scratch (Turns into a cat)  
(Starfire)

Cuz when the world needs heroes on patrol  
Teen Titans GO!

(Cyborg does the robot)

(Raven, tired of watching the 'amateurs' grabs the microphone)

Robin the boss, yeah, he is really up tight (Robin: "Hey!")  
Teen Titans!  
If Beastboy starts joking you have to turn out his lights (Beastboy cringes)

Teen Titans!

They've got the bad guys on the run  
till we stop them with 800 tonnes

(Cyborg)  
Unless we get beaten, crashed or the car gets towed

(Together)  
Teen Titans GO!

Teen Titans GO!

(Robin)

If you're heart is black you'd better watch out

(Starfire)  
It's really bad and unhealthy

(Robin)

If you need help just give us a shout

(Starfire)  
In my words: La pleeka zarbo bleens  
zarbo bleens

(Together, except Beastboy who transforms into a penguin and a little shuffle and slide)

T-E-E-N! T-I-T-A-N-S! TEEN TITANS! LET'S GO!  
T-E-E-N! T-I-T-A-N-S! TEEN TITANS! LET'S GO!  
T-E-E-N! T-I-T-A-N-S! TEEN TITANS! LET'S GO!  
T-E-E-N! T-I-T-A-N-S! TEEN TITANS! LET'S GO!

(Cyborg's toy Daleks invade and dance around)

Teen Titans GO!  
Teen Titans GO!

(Robin's guitar solo, until Starfire brings out a weird instrument resembling a bagpipe, French horn and accordion. It sounds just like an electric guitar. She plays it better than Robin.)

(Cyborg)

When there's trouble you know who to call  
Ghost busters!  
If you don't have ghosts then you'll have to give **us** a call!   
Teen Titans!

(Robin and Starfire)

When there's evil on the attack

(Cyborg and Beastboy)  
we save the day with brains that they lack

(Raven in a spectacular (and suprising) voice)  
Cuz when the world needs heroes on patrol

(Together)  
Teen Titans GO!

(Silkie doing the 'wiggles'. Daleks dance on the floor.)

One, two, three, four, GO!  
Teen Titans!

…

Everyone stares at Raven who's still humming and dancing. She takes note and quickly hides under her cloak.

"Okay I've had my fun!" says Robin and he returns sweeping up the mess.

"What on earth possessed me to start singing?" says Cyborg confused.

"Teen titans go? I always wonder; where?" ponders Starfire.

"I'm glad that humiliating experience only wasted five minutes of my life." says Raven, calming down to her sarcastic self.

"You have to have a life first!" smiles Beastboy. "I think we can do with another singalong!" and he shakes the maracas.

"Guess where those maracas are going next!"

"Oh! Help!"


	3. Another chapter

**I do not own the Teen Titans, nor the Blues Brothers which this story is based upon.**

Cyborg and Robin head off in the T car on an important mission…

"Come on Rob!" says Cyborg, tapping his steering wheel. "You did promise to meet the Penguin when he was released from the slammer."

"I know, but it doesn't make it better knowing that I can't lay a hand on him…" groans Robin, leaning on the sill.

"Hey! Hey! Hey! No pizza greasy skin on the windows!" says Cyborg.

"Sorry." and he moves off. "But I know _he's_ definitely not going to stay 'clean' for long. I just hope we can put him back in his cage early."

"Same here buddy! What gets me is why he would set up an entertainment centre and in Jump City too! He's practically inviting our inspection of the place!"

"That's what worries me! Let's just hope everything goes as planned…"

…

They pull in, in front of the amphitheatre that Oswald acquired on the dawn of his release. It was cleaned of its old webs and stains, looking ready for business.

Heading past the rows of seats, they make for the stair that will lead them to the office; a great stuffed condor greets them from the top of the staircase in attack position. They look to each other before ascending.

There, sitting behind his little desk, was the Penguin, shuffling papers and smoking his usual long cigar. His monocle gleamed at them and he clapped his odd hands together and smiles his fishy smelling grin, his long nose inviting trouble (he sneezed)

"Ah! Robin, and the renowned Cyborg, how great to see you arrived!" he says in his usual squawky business manner and he extends his hand in a shake. Robin declines.

"What's your angle Penguin?" the boy wonder says, sitting down in one of the chairs. Cyborg also sits down, but unwittingly gets stuck, but he doesn't mention it to save face.

"Angle? What angle? What are you fishing at dear boy?" he says, a little offended.

"Has anyone told you you're a bad actor?"

"Which is one reason why I wanted to see YOU!" smiles the man as he leans back on his chair.

"Um… what?"

"Why THIS of course!" says Oswald, pressing a button on a remote. A screen comes down with a trendy poster displayed with five familiar figures...

**TEEN TITAN'S MUSIC FEST**

"Um… what?" says Robin, looking perplexed with a sweat drop. Cyborg pulls out his eye to check that it's working properly.

"I was hoping…" continues the Penguin, acting while the shock settled in. "That you may help out in my galla opening of this establishment with a little… um… entertainment?"

"Hey, wait a sec!" says Cyborg while trying to budge from the seat. "What makes you think we can even sing, let alone perform infront of people?"

"Let's just say that your old 'friend' Gizmo has an eye around the place." he chuckles. Cyborg frowns and sees the bug on his shoulder and squishes it.

…

(Somewhere else)

"Oh man!" moans Gizmo. "Wasted again!" and he slumps on his work station.

"Hey Giz!" says Mammoth, eating over the circuitry. "What's that green light on this screen?"

"Probably your wasabi sandwich you great oaf!" says Gizmo still sulking.

"But it's flashing! Wasabi doesn't flash… does it?"

"It is?" says the little green clad man. He swivels over to see that he's indeed right; there WAS wasabi on the screen, but ALSO a green flash. "Boy that's a large one! Wonder where that thing's going to come in?" he says whistling.

"Um… A large what?"

"A space ship!"

…

"You see, I have sponsored this little local charity for orphans and…"

"Do you think we're going to fall for that old gag fat man?" says Cyborg, getting annoyed at the Penguin, particularly his choice in furniture.

"Like we'd believe a white sheeted story like that?" says Robin raising a brow. "You must be losing your grip bird brain."

The Penguin frowns. "If that is the case, I firmly suggest you leave the premises good sirs, lest you have better things to say to my offer!"

Robin sits cross legged and arms behind his head. He wasn't budging. The Penguin was up to something, but what? He had to find out. He was staying until he got a better answer, or maybe until he cracked the case wide open.

Cyborg also remained seated, he wasn't budging either. He was still stuck.

"May I remind you good sirs that I have the right to escort you off the premises by any means necessary!" says Oswald, reaching into his desk.

Robin holds his birdarang gun and Cyborg holds his cannon ready. "Sorry Ozzie." says Robin. "But no shooting umbrellas or hired gorillas are going to move us until you give us the answers we came here to get!"

"As I said Boy blunder; I'm going clean!" reminds the Penguin. "As such, I am abandoning such use of force for more… tactile approaches." and he slaps a wooden ruler on his hand.

"Ha! A ruler?" laughs Cyborg, packing his gun away. Robin does likewise and the mirth. "You're going to chase US out with a ruler? Come on man! You've got to be kidding me!"

"Like we're going to cower at the mercy of a stupid bird wielded… OUCH!" yells Robin as the Penguin hits his knuckles. "That hurt! Owowow!"

Cyborg looks on half smiling as Robin starts to curl up as the Penguin starts to go like a mad golfer with the ruler. "Man this is priceless… OW!" he shouts as the Penguin begins hitting at him too.

"Now kindly move along young sirs and be off!" says the Penguin, using his fine art in sword play to launch a heavy assault of wooden pain. "Feel my fury!"

"Stand your ground CY!" shouts Robin under constant flinches as the ruler connects with his arms. "He can't… owow… keep this Ow up forever! OUCH! My head!"

"You have to do better than that old man! OOOOWWW! You mabe be bit by blip!" he says shielding and cowering from the offended bird. The Penguin, getting tired of hitting again and again, just rebounded it between both of them, until suddenly the ruler snaps on Cyborg's metal. "Phew!" Cyborg sighs in relief, until the Penguin reaches for his cane. Cyborg grimaces but keeps focused. "Stand firm Rob… Rob?"

Robin was already out the door leaving Cyborg to face the terror of the cane wielding Penguin. (Sound's funny huh!) Like a professional fencer (He was), Penguin launches in a flurry of parry, thrusts and swipes with the rod. Still stuck, Cyborg sort of shuffles backwards, unable to avoid the painful blows until he is able to get on his two feet with the chair still on his bum. One step back and he falls down the stairs in a back flip and over and onto the waiting Robin in a smash.

"Now go, until you have redeemed yourselves!" says the Penguin, shrinking back and closing the door.

…

After a brief moment of silence, Cyborg gets up, not too badly hurt by the fall as much as the cane. Luckily he landed on something soft, the chair, and coincidently Robin, who lies mangulated on the floor.

"Ow…" Robin manages to say as Cyborg peels him off the floor. "That wasn't quite as well as we had expected was it?" he moans, rubbing his head.

"Hey, maybe he'll slip up a little later. Catching criminals is a game of patience. And… err… and where's that 'ooh' and 'aahs' coming from anyway?" he says, realising the murmur. Behind him are the orphans of North Jump City.

"WOW!" exclaims a kid. "I didn't think the Penguin was telling the truth!"

"Are they real?" says another.

"Prod them and find out!" says a group and the horde rushes in with autograph pads and pencils. Those who couldn't poke them used the pencils.

"Hey! Now just wait a sec kids!" says Cyborg, hoisting the now pencil marked Robin above the sea of fans. "What are you all doing here?"

"Mr. C said that he had gotten you guys to perform for us!" says one ecstatic girl. "We didn't know it was true until now!"

"With the money, we can finally fix up the old orphanage!" says another boy in a wheelchair. "You guys rock!"

"This is so GURGALURGE!"

"Can you sign my arm cast?"

Cyborg begins to sweat nervously as the praising goes on and his ability to resist the Penguin's fine plot was dropping. Robin notices the Penguin looking on from the staircase smiling and waving with a contract and pen ready.

This wasn't going the way it was planned…

**Really doing this to get away from my dark fiction of Teentitans vs Fanfiction, which I'm also doing at the same time. Havea read if you're game enough.**

**Happy Readings!**


	4. Fourth chapter here!

**Sorry, deleted it accidently somehow when reading over it. Sorry if you've read the chapter already!**

**Usual disclaimer**

"Well that was a really weird turn of events!" says Beastboy scratching his head. "When's the show anyhow?"

"One week." says Robin, looking through some music sheets.

"WHAT?"

Raven storms out being followed by Starfire. "There is NO way I'm getting on stage!" Raven fumes.

"But friend Raven," pleads Starfire. "The children are counting on us! It would be truly unfair to them for us to…"

"The answer's still NO!"

"Got stage fright huh?" says Beastboy giving her a nudge.

"Well… no, but." she blushes and sweats. "But it's probably some scheme by the Penguin to get us, I just know it!"

"But helping out the needy is what we do." says Starfire. "Remember when we held the tour for the heart foundation children on Valenteens (Robin: "Valentines") Valencetines day? Do you not wish to bring the same joy?"

"Err…" points out Robin. "Don't you remember that Gizmo and gang trashed the tower while the tour distracted us, leaving the entire city vulnerable to a massacre of the Joker (See the fiction 'The Joker')?"

"That is beside the point…"

"Come on guys!" moans Raven. "We can't possibly perform, not with Gizmo and Mammoth AND Jinx still out there! We have more important things to do. This is serious business here; I know it may be unfair for the kids, but they have to learn that all life isn't a walk in the park!"

"Isn't park being stationary vehicles?" says Starfire.

Raven groans. "Sorry Starfire, but this is no time to start acting like idiots…"

(Cyborg from the bathroom and Raven holds her head in shame. Song in Little Richard's version on Sesame Street. Alternatively you can try and imagine a jazz or Ray Charles version of the song if you havn't heard the Littel Richard version Which I believe is the best!)

Rubber Ducky, you're the one.  
You make bath time lots of fun  
Rubber Ducky; I'm awfully fond of you.

(Beastboy grabs his saxophone)  
Rubber Ducky, joys of joys  
When I squeak you, you make noise

(Cyborg bursts out with white tux and slides a piano to him)  
Rubber Ducky, you're my very best friend, it's true!  
(Starfire and Robin grab their guitars)  
Everyday when I make my way to the tubby  
I find a little fella who' cute, yellow, and chubby.  
(Together)(rub-a-dub-a-dubby)  
(Raven looks on distraught as they start jamming and dancing to the soap suds)  
Rubber Ducky you're so fine  
And I'm lucky that you're mine  
Rubber Ducky, I'm awfully fond of you.  
(Cyborg's army of mechanical rubber duckies is marched along by Silkie in sun glasses)  
Everyday when I make my way to the tubby  
I find a little fella who's cute, yellow, and chubby.  
(rub-a-dub-a-dubby)  
(Whole tower is in suds with the 'band' still playing. Bestboy saxaphone solo.)  
Rubber Ducky, you're so fine  
And I'm glad that you're mine  
Rubber Ducky I'm awfully fond of...  
Rubber Ducky I'd like a whole pond of . . .  
Rubber Ducky I'm awfully fond of yoooouuuu.

"Booyah! This is gonna be great!" says Cyborg packing away everything in a press of a button. Soap suds fly out of the tower to the bemusement of the passers by.

"I can't believe we're doing this…" sighs Raven and she begins looking through the music.

"Thankyou friend Raven, I knew we could count on you!" smiles Starfire and gives her a genuine Starfire hug (Which is also a trademark move by some professional wrestlers) Raven gasps for air as she is let down again.

"Think of all the fun!" says Cyborg still dancing to the ducky song.

"Think of bringing down the house!" says Robin, dreaming of locking up the Penguin.

"Think of all the beautiful women!" says Beastboy, tilting his shades.

Raven sighs. "You guys are insane, do you know that?" Bestboy holds his nose and spurts bubbles from his ears.

…

A very large craft hovers over earth's atmosphere with a cloaking device so intricate, only Gizmo's fine genius can track it (He has a little satellite army in orbit which had smashed into the great thing!) The Gordonian pilots, iguana resembling aliens in orange armour sat at the controls of the vessel, intent on performing their task by their employer.

Blackfire smiles…


	5. Chapter after the last one

**Do I really need to say it again? I don't own the Titans!**

Later that night…

"Well, I think these songs should be great." says Cyborg, looking over the selected songs. It had taken them a while to get a good list that would be appropriate for the kids as well as the adults. The blues sounded best, along with jazz. Raven's _Headless Chicken's_ songs were declined so she sat in a dark corner.

Robin notices. "You know Raven, you have the best voice out of all of us." he says, trying to brighten her spirits.

"Yeah right!" says Raven, rolling her eyes.

"But it is the true!" says Starfire, rubbing her tired eyes and yawning. "Your voice is like a Gethar pethan in the rectum season."

Beastboy almost chokes on his late night sandwich "Err, did she say…?"

"Tamarean BB, not the human translation." assures Cyborg.

"I'll just play a kazoo or something guys, you're great on your own." she says, she wasn't the one for the stage light. "I don't think I should sing…"

"But you do great songs Rae!" assures Beastboy. "Remember the song you sang in the hospital for that cancer kid?"

"It wasn't anything special…" she blushes.

"I was not present on that occasion." says Starfire. "What did you sing friend Raven?"

"Yeah Rae! Give us a song!" says Cyborg, getting out his MP9 player. "I'll provide the background music.

Raven shakes her head. "But it's a baby song!"

"Hey, you sang it to a kid! Go figure! I liked it." says Beastboy.

"See! It's a baby song!"

"H-E-Y!"

After a lot of coaxing, the team finally managed to get Raven to sing, much to her embarrassment; but it was just her friends.

"Only for you guys though…" she reminds and opens her mouth…

(Music starts and she just matches her tone to the tune in an amazing wave of sound. Robin and Cyborg manage a 'wow' while Starfire stretches on the couch and Beastboy quickly grabs his tape recorder)

**(Please use your imagination; this song is really good when sung by practically anyone, let alone Raven (in this case, Tara Strong whom I've heard sings pretty good))**

**The words of this song struck me, not only for their deeper meaning, but also the effect it might have on a character like Raven. The fact that Jim Henson is now dead, also gives it an epitaph feel if anything. Think about it.**

**Happy Readings!**

(I don't want to live on the moon, Sesame Street)

_Well, I'd like to visit the moon  
On a rocket ship high in the air  
Yes, I'd like to visit the moon  
But I don't think I'd like to live there _

_  
Though I'd like to look down at the earth from above  
I would miss all the places and people I love  
So although I might like it for one afternoon  
I don't want to live on the moon_

I'd like to travel under the sea  
I could meet all the fish everywhere  
Yes, I'd travel under the sea  
But I don't think I'd like to live there 

_I might stay for a day there if I had my wish  
But there's not much to do when your friends are all fish  
And an oyster and clam aren't real family (Looks at the others who are in awe)  
So I don't want to live in the sea  
(Beastboy's favorite part)  
I'd like to visit the jungle, hear the lions roar  
Go back in time and meet a dinosaur  
There's so many strange places I'd like to be  
But none of them permanently _

_  
So if I should visit the moon  
Well, I'll dance on a moonbeam and then  
I will make a wish on a star  
And I'll wish I was home once again _

_  
Though I'd like to look down at the earth from above  
I would miss all the places and people I love  
So although I may go I'll be coming home soon…  
'Cause I don't want to live on the moon  
No, I don't… want to live… on the moon_

Raven turns bright pink. Beastboy sniffles but hides it while Cyborg and Robin clap nervously; they had a winner here! Starfire sleeps peacefully hugging a pillow.

As she stands, something happens and the room seems to spin. She has flashbacks of her nightmares of the world's destruction.

"Something wrong Rae?" says Cyborg.

"I… I need to sleep…" says Raven, with skulls flashing in front of her. Her friends looked like stone and the tower seemed decimated, but she knew she was hallucinating; she knew she had to get away. Without a word, they let her go… she locks the door.

…

Raven sat and cried.

Why? Why now? Why now when she had done so well? When she had sung so good?

The images of death still flashing in her mind; aggravated by the song, her evil was stirring again. Was there no end? She dared not show it to her friends, but she was afraid. Obscurity and darkness surrounded her life. As she could not fit with the world, the world would not accept her… she didn't belong here, amongst the happy people… she didn't belong… this was her home…

**Thankyou for all the reviews thus far! This is turning into my most popular fic yet! Hoping to bring in some Blues Brothers, though maybe not quite who you expect!**


	6. Some other chapter with dancing

**THIS TOOK ME SOME IMAGINATION TO TIME WRITE, SO PLEASE LISTEN TO THE SONG WHILE READING. YOU WON'T BE DISSAPOINTED.**

**Listen to the Lego version of Monty Python 'Knights of the round table' if you are unfortunate enough not to know the song. It relies on the original sound effects, so get this one (recommended)**

"You okay Raven?" asks Robin, looking at the slightly drowsy hooded girl.

"Yeah… I'm fine…" she says weakly. Her night had been a little rough on the nerves. "Just a little headache…"

"You didn't really have to come along you know Rae." says Cyborg, driving the car. "You could have stayed at home a bit. You know we'd consult you before finalizing our recruiting today."

"And let you guys hire some stalwart pansies? I don't think so!"

"I don't think it's all that worrying. They're only singers and musicians." says Robin in the front seat. "I don't really think we need extra help, but the Penguin wrote it in fine print on the paper. I'm hoping these guys are okay…"

"What are these 'Sing-along Dancers' like?" asks Starfire. "I like past time of singing and dancing almost as much as I like listening and watching."

"Oh! They're the best of the best guys!" says Beastboy, who had suggested the troop, which was another reason why Raven came along. "You WON'T be disappointed!"

"And to think that all the other musical troops are booked up already!" sighs Raven.

"Oh don't be such a worry wart!"

"Wart? Where!" says Starfire, stretching across the seats in the back to examine Raven's face with great concern, rocking the car a bit.

"He's right Raven." says Robin. "These guys have been highly recommended on the news. I doubt we'll be disappointed…"

"We're here guys! Stop poking her Star! Look Camelot!" says Cyborg whistling as they approach a giant castle.

"Camelot!" Beastboy

"Camelot?" says Starfire

Robin shrugs. "It's only a model."

"Shhh!" and he pricked his ears. "I think they're singing something!"

Beastboy leaps out with a paper Mache crown and says dramatically. "Then let us ride, TO CAMELOT!"

(Start corny music.)

(Four knights pop up in front and sing)

_We're Knights of the Round Table,_

_We dance when ere we're able,_

_We do routines and chorus scenes_

_With footwork impeccable._

_We dine well here in Camelot,_

_We eat ham and jam and spam a lot._

(Musicians dancing around and a chorus line of pike men do 'River dance' Beastboy is standing in awe, while the others are standing awfully perplexed. Starfire looks confused, not quite getting the words fast enough.)

_We're Knights of the Round Table,_

_Our shows are for-midable,_

(Robin Hood and merry men swing from the rafters)

_But many times, we're given rhymes_

_That are quite unsingable._

_We're Opera mad in Camelot,_

_We sing from the diaphragm a looooooot._

(As the knights continue to prance about and waving handkerchiefs, they notice Beastboy clapping to the song by himself in the silent auditorium… There's an impressive tap dance routine by some costume horses … A jester drummer actually comes up and starts using Cyborg for a good metal sound, until he hits on the head and falls over)

_In war we're tough and able,_

(Raven grabs Beastboy before he can fly up to join them. He squawks)

_Quite in-de-fati-gable,_

(Some knights do the can-can and the team all step back a bit.)

_Between our quests we sequin vests,_

_And impersonate Clark Gable._

_It's a busy life in Camelot,_

(The 'king' steps up)

_I HAVE TO PUSH THE PRAM ALOOOOOT_

There is great dancing and twirling and arrows flying everywhere with Robin hood doing a trapeze flip. Music plays on and onto finale.

"On second thoughts, let's just exit quietly. Tis a silly place." says Robin with a sweat drop.

**(If you didn't get the actions with the lyrics, read it and listen it and sing it again! I DEMAND IT! GWAHAHA! Just kidding, do as you wish!)**

"Did you just say 'tis'?" says Cyborg, rubbing his head.

Starfire and Beastboy are humming and dancing a bit with Raven looking rather emotionally scarred. They exit and are about to get in the car when…

Suddenly they become aware of ice cream truck music and a pink van pulling up. "Why hello my band. How are you this fine day?" says the Penguin pulling up on his Ice cream truck.

Beastboy turns into a penguin and Robin looks a little sheepish. "Um… why the…?"

The Penguin sighs. "Have to start off somewhere don't I? Every little bit counts! Got to keep the funds flowing you know. That'll be two fifty." and he hands Beastboy a soy cone.

"Why are you here?" says Raven.

"Well I got wind that you were searching for a band, so I came here to get you one. Times flying as it is…"

"You have one in mind?"

"You might not like it, but…" says the Penguin shrugging. "I do believe they are the best of the best of the best and will definitely call in the audience we need."

"That is good!" says Starfire smiling. "These knights were only the best of the best. The best of the best of the best should be much greater, if possible. And who is Clark Gable?"

"Who?"

"Ahem…" coughs Cyborg. "How good are they exactly? Got any promo's, news paper cuttings…?"

The Penguin hands an Icy pole to a kid in the long line and smiles. "…Wanted posters."

"What?" say the titans together.

"Hey! I'll pay! I'll pay!" says the kid, throwing in two dollars and running off.


	7. Ha! Another chapter!

The dark dungeons of Jump City prison reeked of wet newspaper, which was explained by the paper recycling bin being left open in the rain.

The Titans eerily followed the Penguin, despite the fact that there was more security then you could poke a stick at, they still didn't like being around dangerous criminals, many of whom they had locked up themselves.

In the mess hall, it was a mess. But a crude stage was set up from long tables into another room with red curtains. The guards manned the spotlights and suddenly they noticed in the canteen…

Raven looks on with a sweat drop. "Oh……… I can't say it or else the rating will go up…"

(Music starts from the band, the Jump City Prison Jazz band that is, with Mad Mod as conductor. A very well voiced Elvis impersonator sings the song from his dark prison cell. They come across the most darnest sight they have ever seen… Mumbo and Control Freak… THE BLUES BROTHERS!)

(Mumbo does his little dance like a scarecrow who sat on a porcupine)

_A little less conversation, a little more action please_

(CtrlF does the V sign across his shades and shoulder shuffle)  
_All this aggravation ain't satisfactioning _me

(Kitten leads the saxophones)

_A little more bite and a little less bark  
A little less fight and a little more spark _

_Close your mouth and open up your heart and baby satisfy me_  
_Satisfy me_  
(Beastboy rubs his eyes to make sure he isn't seeing things)

"How pleasant…" says Starfire, before she sees the Starfire dart board…

"Pinch me…" says Robin nervously.

"I beg your pardon…"

"Pinch me… slap me, kick me, hit with a starbolt! DO SOMETHING QUICK! I'M HALUCINATING! I JUST KNOW IT!" he yells frantic.

Starfire ponders for a second and sees an opportunity. She pecks a kiss on his cheek and Robin faints.

"I don't think he meant that!" comments Cyborg. "Though it's just as effective I'll admit!"

"Shhh! I'm trying to listen here!" says Beastboy and the others stare at him.

"Another born every minute…" sighs Raven.

_Baby close your eyes and listen to the_ music (Dr. Light on French horn)  
_Drifting through a summer breeze_ (Dr. Chang doing the techno stuff)  
_It's a groovy night and I can show you how to use it_ (Rancid is on the drums)  
_Come along with me and put your mind at ease_ (Adonis frowns and does a little triangle…)

_A little less conversation, a little more action please_

(Blue's villains slide in and if you've ever seen the Blue's brothers dance… well… that's how they are.)

_All this aggravation ain't satisfactioning me  
A little more bite and a little less bark  
A little less fight and a little more spark  
Close your mouth and open up your heart and baby satisfy me  
Satisfy me_

_Come on baby I'm tired of talking_

(Brass section stands up)  
_Grab your coat and let's start walking_

(Spotlights flash around)  
_Come on, come on_  
_Come on, come on_   
_Come on, come on_

(Fang does guitar while his other limbs work the pitches)  
_Don't procrastinate, don't articulate_  
_Girl it's getting late, gettin' upset waitin' around_

(Mumbo and CtrlF do a back flip to centre stage and start grooving like Austin Powers)

_A little less conversation, a little more action please_  
_All this aggravation ain't satisfactioning me_

_(Guards can't help tapping their feet or swaying a bit)_  
_A little more bite and a little less bark  
A little less fight and a little more spark  
Close your mouth and open up your heart and baby satisfy me  
Satisfy me_

(Mumbo and CtrlF steal the show with really well rehearsed moves, a little robot, twist, tap dance and even the Flamenco! The didgeridoo sound and they even do an Aborigine style.)

_Come on baby I'm tired of talking_

(Saxophone section stands, but is glared down by Kitten)  
_Grab your coat and let's start walking_

(Disco ball lowers)  
_Come on, come on_  
_Come on, come on_   
_Come on, come on_  
_Don't procrastinate, don't articulate_  
_Girl it's getting late, gettin' upset waitin' around_

_(Killer Moth is revealed as the Elvis impersonator)_

(Mumbo and CtrlF and the band start standing and sliding side to side)

_A little less conversation, a little more action please_  
_All this aggravation ain't satisfactioning me_

_(Guards dancing with batons)_  
_A little more bite and a little less bark  
A little less fight and a little more spark  
Close your mouth and open up your heart and baby satisfy me  
Satisfy me_

(Mod thrashes about with his baton before losing footing and falling on the stand to end the music.)

"So what do you think?" smiles the Penguin behind the one way mirror.

"You have got to be kidding!" says Robin frowning. He elbows Beastboy who is trying to copy the dance moves.

"I just know something really bad is going to happen…" moans Raven.

"And I'm not going to start it!" says Robin. "No way Penguin!"

"Oh well! I tried!" says Oswald, shrugging. "I'll just break the news to them. Go shuffle off!"

"Hey! How do we know you aren't planning a jail break or somethin'?" says Cyborg.

"What? ME? Oh come off it!"

"Come off what?" says Starfire.

"Just go on now, I can handle this by myself! Shoo! Off you go!" and he ushers them out, and then gets barred by Robin.

"Sorry Penguin, we're going to have to keep tabs on you while you're here!" he says resolute.

"As you wish…" he smiles

"PLEASE don't make me do that again!" whines Killer Moth, sweating exhausted as he holds the microphone.

"Oh come on pops! We were just getting warmed up!" says Kitten, still dancing a bit.

"This works wonders on my old limbs!" says Mumbo, twirling his arms. He kept a blue mask on to save face and to look cool. "Much better than those bench press-a-ma-jingles!"

"I don't know guys! I think I could move faster! Does this suit make my butt look big?" says CtrlF. Kitten is about to make a slight remark when they hear clapping…

"Bravo, bravo!" says the Penguin, walking in with the Titans. "Quite a show! Bravo indeed!"

A bugle, farty sound comes from the orchestra.

"Did you have to do that?" says Mod, glaring at the petrified Dr. Light. "I demand utmost respect and authority young sir!"

"S… s… sorry…" he stutters as he hides from Raven.

"What are they going to do? Throw us in ANOTHER prison?" says Chang. "Calm down and put the bugle down man!"

"It wasn't the bugle…" and they all shuffle away a bit.

"Ahem… anyways." continues the Penguin. "I just popped in to see how you fellows were getting along with rehearsals! (Nods and groans and a 'Get lost ya' blimp!') Do you know the little charity performance I arranged for a considerable time off your respective sentences?" he smiles. The villains nod and the Titans frown at the manipulator. "Well! Here's the famous rock group you are going to be performing with! May I present to you; THE TEEN TITAN'S ROCK" and he gestures to the Titans…

After general silence…there is some general uproar and the guards are called in with Uzi's… Dr. Light rolls around in foetal position and the band is locked up in the canteen before they can strangle the Penguin… which doesn't stop the Titans or the dancers from trying to do so themselves…

**The Lancer preview (A series I'm thinking of writing) **

**The Lancer/ Robin Victor Garfield Roth Grayson**

**Age: 14**

**Height: a little taller than Robin**

**Eyes: Blue or green or both, depending on mood.**

**Hair: Dark Red, unless in disguise when it's purple**

**Likes: Mustard, pizza, mustard pizza, Dr Who, Garfield Logan's Animal Adventures, History (Class)**

**Dislikes: Any form of creepy crawlies, violence, swearing or anything else his mother said was really bad and shouldn't do…**

**Specialty: Starbolts, flying and detective work**

**Son of Starfire and Robin/Nightwing. With his father busy in Bludhaven as a superhero and mother a diplomat for Tamaran (Trying to stop the invasion of earth) he is left in the care of his nanny, or K'norfka Raven, or Rachel Roth, the channel 5 news presenter of Jump City.**

**When he is given a 'super suit' by 'uncle' Victor Stone, he is secretly (unknown to him) used to infiltrate a high security building of Sigma-corp. in a school tour. Things go wrong and he has to put on the suit to evade his pursuers. In the commotion, he is accidentally downloaded with a special program that enables time travel which the power hungry Lucius Sigma needs to conquer all the universe. **

**With help from Chroma, the time travel program, he travels in time to escape as well as to try and change history so he could have a more normal family. He drops in the Teen Titan's days, where things start to go wary… **

**(To those who have read the Lancer series so far, I'm re-writing it. See ya soon! Happy Readings!)**


	8. Another one?

"So Kitten plays the saxophone?" asks Beastboy sitting between the two.

"She wanted the stardom with the rock band, so she put a lot of effort into it." says Control Freak.

"I would stay away from her if I were you." says Mumbo on the other side.

"No need to warn us about THAT!" laughs Cyborg driving the lot back to Titans Tower for rehearsals. Robin sat cross-armed, squishing a stress ball (In the shape of the Penguin).

After a lot of arguing, the Titans agreed to try this out; to give a second chance to the criminals, as well as not to discriminate too much. The band would be right, but the dance moves needed to be planned, so Mumbo and CtrlF were for a little visit. Robin was a bit unhappy… even if they did manage to change the name of the band to TEENTITAN'S GO.

"Friend Cyborg, weather conditions are becoming quite turbulent." says Starfire on the communicator. She and Raven took to the skies to make room for their 'guests'. "We shall be flying low."

"We're still twenty minutes from home Star." says Robin. "Stay close to Raven if it starts to rain. Her shield will keep you dry."

"I shall." replies Starfire.

"Over and out." says Robin, and closes the link.

"I must admit you're taking this rather well young lad!" says Mumbo. "I didn't really expect…"

"You're both sleeping in the dungeon…"

"Ah yes, quite right…"

There is a little silence and awkwardness…

"So…" says CtrlF. "You guys are over the last time we ganged up on you?" (See **_Tales of Gotham and Jump City_**)

"Maybe just a little annoyed…" says Beastboy. "But I was a tree for most of the time anyway. How dangerous could you have been if Cyborg and Star, (who was still in a wheelchair), beat all four of you by themselves?"

"Man that was good!" laughs Cyborg, as he remembers their pretty darn good fighting despite the odds.

"I blush to admit it." says Mumbo. "Yes, the defeat was quite demoralizing."

"Hey!" grumbles CtrlF. "If it wasn't for us helping you out, Mod probably would have blown up every nuclear silo and power-plant in the world! I think you owe us 'un-sung heroes' _some_ respect!"

"What about Kitten?" says Robin.

"Okay… scrap her maybe!"

"But just remember that we also helped you regenerate after Mod sucked the youth (Or what was left) out of all of you!"

"Okay, then let's just call it even then!" says Mumbo. "We all saved the world and we're not giving any credit to that spoiled brat!"

"Oh man!" laughs Cyborg. "I can't believe we're agreeing on something! This is just classic!"

"So what made you guys dance?" says Beastboy.

"Oh, the old body needed a workout!" says Mumbo.

"Reduced time in the slammer." says CtrlF. "Pretty good deal for a little shuffle and slide!"

"The Penguin really knew how to tug us into this mess!" says Robin. "Makes me wonder what he's really up to…"

"Whatever it is, it's sure to be all about the money!"

"Stealing from a fundraiser? Now that's pretty low!" says Cyborg.

"Oh look, a little lightning." says CtrlF looking out the window, before the bolt explodes right next to the car, causing them to swerve.

Luckily the road was open and empty, but the bolts just kept coming…

"Starfire! Raven! Do you copy?" says Robin. Cyborg switches on a network cable that attaches to him in order to try and predict the paths of the bolts overhead.

"We read you Robin!" says Raven, holding up her shield. "Wait! Robin! There's a…" but the communication is cut.

"Raven? Starfire?" calls out Robin.

"What in the world is happening out there?" says Mumbo, holding to the car tightly as they swerved bolts of energy. Suddenly the rain hits hard and the wind becomes intolerable. Dust flies in the rain to form mud that gets flung at the car at great speed.

"This reminds me of episode CXVI of Star Trod!" says CtrlF gulping. "When they were trapped in a transmute vortex of quarks!"

"(Wrong answer buzzer sound)That was episode CXVII!" says Beastboy.

"It was a two part episode! Ha!"

"I'll just be a sec guys! Gotta see what's happened to them…" says Robin, still strapped to his seat he opens the door and both he and his seat fly out, transforming in a small jet pack. Rain flies in to put out the small lift off fire that started.

"Ouch my feet!"

"This is gonna get nasty! Hang on!" says Cyborg as sparks fly. One bolt smashes a crater in front of them, but the car is able to tackle the oversized pothole, but it does send Beastboy forward and hitting the radio on. Mumbo and CtrlF manage to pull him back…

(Here's the song…)

(All of them scream out as they see a tornado)

_I can see clearly now the rain has gone (Scream as it hails)_

_I can see all obstacles in my way_

(CtrlF: "Holy cow! Look out!")(Cow: MoooOOO… KERSPLAAAT) (Together:"Ewwww!")

_Gone are the dark clouds that had me blind (Shadows grow larger)_

_It's going to be a bright,(Bright bright) bright sunshiny day_

(Cyborg: "There's something huge over us!")

_I think I can make it now the pain has gone_ (Robin gets electrocuted)

_And all of the bad feelings have disappeared_ (Raven bursts out of a cloud in pain)

_Here is the rainbow I've been praying for_ (Raven forms into that scary giant shadow bird)

_It's gonna be a bright,(Bright bright), bright sunshiny day_

_Look all around there's nothing but blue skies_ (A huge red ship blots the sun and tries to beam up the T-car)

_Look straight ahead nothing but blue skies _

(After supreme driving by Cyborg, a lightning bolt finally strikes the car, smashing it to pieces. Robin flies in the way of the ship's beam and gets sapped up instead)

_I think I can make it now the pain has gone_

(Raven: "Beam THIS!Azerath Metrion Zinthos!")

_And all of the bad feelings have disappeared_

(The blast hits the ship in the tractor beam, exploding it)

_I can see clearly now the rain has gone _(Ship flies off and the weather improves)

_It's gonna be a bright,(Bright bright), bright_

_Sunshiny day_

…

As the rain poured, Beastboy carefully patted Cyborg's back as they surveyed the car… or at least the car frame which was left. Mumbo knocks the soot out of an ear and CtrlF twitches a bit with a spark. Raven flies down and sneezes, causing the radio to turn back on again…

"I'll just turn it off.." says Beastboy, but Cyborg stops him.

"Let it speak man… let it be." he says traumatized…

(Song is Raindrops keep falling on my head and the view pans out to the credits)

**Author's note: Aha! Now where have Robin and Starfire been abducted to? You probably know already. Happy Readings!**

(BB's little version)

Raindrops keep fallin' on my head  
Sulfuric acid, and now my face is turning red!  
Cryin's not for me (Sob)  
Those raindrops are fallin' on my head, they keep fallin'  
I look like melted cheese!  
Somethin's worryin' me


	9. This is getting repetitive

"Blackfire." says Starfire, facing off her sister.

"Starfire." answers Blackfire gloating at the captain's seat of the space ship.

"Blackfire." frowns Robin, in energy binders like Starfire.

"Robin." smiles Blackfire.

"Starfire?" sys Robin, looking to her.

Starfire shakes her head, she can't budge and the binders also somehow depleted her laser eye ability. "Robin?" Robin also shakes his head, his utility belt being held by one of the reptilian Gordonian guards.

"I'm glad we got an introduction." whispers one of the crew, who gets an elbow for hush.

"Welcome aboard dear sister, and cute earth hero." says Blackfire, standing up. She wears gold shoulder pads of the Captain rank. "How do you like the El' Nino?"

"Very nice... Can we go now?" says Robin. One of the guards bats him lightly on the head with his static staff. "Ow!"

"El' Nino?" says Starfire puzzled. "That is not a Tamaranean name, nor is it alike any Gordonian vocabulary I have listened of."

"It's an earth name my inept sister." says Blackfire, strutting down. "No doubt that your friend here has heard of such a name?"

"Yeah, so?" says Robin, twisting his toe on the floor. "It's a natural phenomenon of weather."

"Phenememnee… Phenoomenom… Phelelemon…" struggles Starfire, twisting her tongue.

"Stop before you hurt yourself." says Blackfire, slightly embarrassed. "This ship, that I designed myself, with a little cooperation from the Gordonian war corporation, is the first war ship equipped with weather manipulating defence and weapon systems; using the storms and natural processes of your own planet against you. Muahaha!"

"Reaching one target Captain." says one of the Gordonians. "Number 4 priority of the 6 requested."

"Very good! But the rest can come in any time in any order. The first one was the only essential one for this plan to succeed." laughs Blackfire. "Get the transmit beam ready."

"This is treason Blackfire." says Starfire. "The Gordonians are one of the sworn enemies of Tamaran!"

"Why else did I join them?" shrugs Blackfire. "And why else did they let me? Oh well! You'll have a nice time in the hold. As custom to earth; To-to!"

"That's ta-ta." smirks Robin.

"Whatever!" and she walks out with two escorts.

A rather large guard approaches with some evilly designed tool in his hand with a large sharp point. Robin gulps.

"Can I have your autograph? I love the comics!" says the reptile, handing him the pen and a note pad.

"Uh… sure…" says Robin with a sweat drop and gets released to sign the paper. "Who to?"

"Gragularloogeygaffer."

"To G! Right!" and upon signing he is re-cuffed.

"The captain has left the ship." announces one of the crew.

"Right. Get these two down to the hold!" says the guard, reforming his gruff attitude.

"But I don't want go to the hold." says Robin, standing defiant.

"I also do not wish to go." nods Starfire. "I like the view here. But we seem to have little given choice…"

"Duck…"

"What?"

"Duck!"

"Me?" says the guard.

"Not you! Her!" says Robin angrily. One of the female reptilians drops down.

"Why did you ask her to duck friend Robin?"

"Just Duck Starfire!"

"Quack…"

"What is this duck? Some sort of earth custom?" says the Guard.

Robin holds his head. "…Aliens…" he groans, and he gently trips Starfire over (As gently as he possibly could) and kicked up the small bomb he had unscrewed from the sole of his shoe. A brilliant explosion followed by a grey haze that filled the command deck. "Okay! Move!" says Robin after decking one of the guards with his binders to get his belt back in his mouth. With great difficulty he freed his hands with what tools he could get out with his teeth.

Jumping into a fray where Starfire was, he pulls her out and heads to the door which is opened by a confused lunch robot. They make their escape.

"Where do you think the hanger is?" says Robin, running down the corridor.

"Third right." says the guard.

"Right… … ?... wait…" and Robin turns and sees the female Gordonian he had pulled out. "This is sooo not right…" he says, and he resumes running as the Gordonian is soon calling reinforcements.

…

After a brief struggle, Starfire was apprehended and six Gordonians taken to sick bay. Starfire had gotten a nasty fighting tactic from Beastboy which used the teeth as the main mode of weaponry. She hoped Robin would make it out alright… and she also hoped that he didn't dump her for that Gordonian guard.

…

Robin looks at the controls of the ship and grimaces.

"Hey!" he says, firing his grappling hook, and hauling up the semi conscious security guard. "Do you have a manual or something?"

"Left pocket…" says the dazed alien. "No. Other left."

"Thanks!... It's in English?"

"Standard universal language. Easiest to learn and understand…"

"Great." and he drops the guard and does up the straps in the cockpit.

The security blasts the hangar doors open and start firing at the craft, but Robin zooms out through the hangar bay shield and into the storm…

…

He didn't like leaving Star there, but from what he could make from the crew, they probably weren't into sadistic entertainment or anything like that. He also was no match for a whole invasion size force of muscular lizard people.

The storm rattled and shook his small craft. It was dark in the hangar, on the account he destroyed the lights to surprise the security. He could only tell that the ship had wings as he jumped in. Now, as the clouds and hail and static stopped biting at him, he had a better view of his earth bi-plane.

"So this is how they go unnoticed…" he says, rather displeased as sees some more advanced, better looking craft heading his way. Great bars of energy fly out from their large side turrets. "I could have taken one of THOSE? Why did I have to hi-jack the bi-plane?"

Flying lower, he realises that his speed is far outmatched, and the craft just pass him completely, so they have to turn around.

"Okay! Let's see what this old timer can do!" says Robin, looking at the machine gun controls. He spots a craft and presses the trigger.

Have you seen men in black II? Remember that decoy driver that pops up? Yeah, they have one too!

A smiling dummy of a pilot, complete with goggles, fur coat and long mustache, is stuffed back into the compartment as Robin struggles up again.

"I really don't like aliens!" he moans as the beams almost hit. "Except Starfire of course." he turns and sees that there is no avoiding the next spray of fire and does a desperate lunge from the plane.

The beams connect and engulf the plane in an electric field in-tact, drawing it between the ships in a tractor beam. The two fighters take the ship back, unaware that the occupant is plummeting to the earth…

…

"Hang on there!" says Spiderman. The blast was so sudden, like the clouds had shot the building. He would look into that later. Right now there was someone to save. His spider senses were going haywire in the collapsing building. "Why is there always a fire in a collapsing building around here? Don't those architect people get the message yet?"

"Help! Please help! I'm over here!" says the girl's voice behind a door, shut off by burning debri.

"Stand back! I'm breaking the door down!" he yells. He steps back and leaps at the rubble and door, smashing it away. He quickly gets up and gets into the room. "Where are you?"

"Right here little spider." smiles Blackfire…


	10. Wow! ANOTHER chapter! OoOh!

When there's trouble, you know who to call (TEEN TITANS!)

From their tower, they can see it all (TEEN TITANS!)

When there's evil on the attack

You can rest knowing they got your back

'Cause when the world needs heroes on patrol

TEEN TITANS, GO!

TEEN TITANS, GO!

With their super powers, they unite (TEEN TITANS!)

Never met a villain that they liked (TEEN TITANS!)

They got the bad guys on the run

They never stop until the job gets done

'Cause when the world is losing all control

TEEN TITANS, GO!

TEEN TITANS, GO!

If your heart is black, you better watch out

You cannot escape the team

When they catch you, there won't be any doubt

You've been beaten by the teens

Beaten by the teens

T-E-E-N! T-I-T-A-N-S! TEEN TITANS! LET'S GO!

T-E-E-N! T-I-T-A-N-S! TEEN TITANS! LET'S GO!

T-E-E-N! T-I-T-A-N-S! TEEN TITANS! LET'S GO!

T-E-E-N! T-I-T-A-N-S! TEEN TITANS! LET'S GO!

When there's trouble, you know who to call (TEEN TITANS!)

From their tower, they can see it all (TEEN TITANS!)

When there's evil on the attack

You can rest knowing they got your back

'Cause when the world needs heroes on patrol

TEEN TITANS, GO!

TEEN TITANS, GO!

One, two, three, four, GO!

TEEN TITANS!

"Well? What do you think?" says Mumbo hopefully.

"Nah! Doesn't sound right!" says Beastboy. "I prefer OUR version better!"

"Come on!" says CtrlF (Control Freak) "We took a lot of time changing those words to make some sense! We were trying to make a good impression!"

"Jusd keep pracdicing your dance moves." says Raven, sipping at some cocoa and sneezing in front of the heater. Her nose is stuffed up like an elephant showering itself in a mud bath, if I may use Beastboy's quote. "We hab do go rescue Robin and Darfire. Sniff!" and she sneezes again, exploding a toaster. "Soddy aboud dat."

"Tracking this thing is a darn right pain in the exhaust port!" whines Cyborg at his computer. "How on earth am I meant to find it with all this storm interference?"

"Maybe we can get them on Foxtel?" suggests CtrlF.

Raven sneezes again and the glass of a mirror shapes into a splash and freezes.

"Eww! Psychic boogers!" says Beastboy firmly disgusted. "That is so cool! Do it again!"

Raven less than courteously repeats her sneezing fit in his face. Beastboy is just relieved his head didn't explode.

"Why are you guys worried about Rob and Star anyway?" says Cyborg. "I thought you'd be smiling about something like this?"

"Hey! We're just here to do the gig!" says CtrlF. "If we are going to get this right, we need all of you here."

"And personally, anyone else to get revenge on you Titans would dent my pride." adds Mumbo, and the two nod.

"You two are definitely sleeping in the dungeon." nods Cyborg.

Raven sneezes and Beastboy yelps at 35km/hour into the sofa…

…

"Right smack in the middle! Now what are the chances of THAT?" laughs the Guinness world record instructor beside the world's largest trampoline.

It had taken a while, but Robin was now safe on Earth (A little queasy none the less) with a world record now under his alias for the highest trampoline jump. He turns on his communicator and quickly relays the events aboard the ship to Cyborg, who in turn gives him his vocal parts to rehearse on his bus trip back while they practiced at the tower and devised a plan…

…

When there's trouble, you know what to call (TEEN TITANS!)

From their tower, they can see it all (TEEN TITANS!)

When there's evil on the attack

You can't rest knowing they got your back

'Cause when the world needs snipers on patrol

TEEN TITANS, GO!

TEEN TITANS, GO!

With their super powers, they unite (TEEN TITANS!)

Never seen a pet they hadn't sniped (TEEN TITANS!)

They are the bad guys havin fun

They never stop until the job gets done

'Cause when the world is losing all control

TEEN TITANS, GO!

TEEN TITANS, GO!

If your heart is black, you better watch out

You cannot escape the team

When they catch you, there won't be any doubt

You've been recruited by the teens

Recruited by the teens

T-E-E-N! T-I-T-A-N-S! TEEN TITANS! LET'S GO!

T-E-E-N! T-I-T-A-N-S! TEEN TITANS! LET'S GO!

T-E-E-N! T-I-T-A-N-S! TEEN TITANS! LET'S GO!

T-E-E-N! T-I-T-A-N-S! TEEN TITANS! LET'S GO!

"Now THAT was pushing it!" says Cyborg, tapping his foot.

"Especially the pet part!" says Beastboy as they both glare at the villains.

"Just no respect for artists these days my good fellow." shakes Mumbo. "Bad times ahead for sure!"

"Can'd anyone ged zome zleep around here. Sniff." goes Raven from her room. She sneezes and the whole place blacks out.

"Well…" says CtrlF. "I'd never think I'd see the day I was locked up with my worst enemies in a giant structurally impossible, short circuited building on a small island. Man, this would make a great reality show!"

…

A gloved hand reaches up the top ledge of a building as the rain poured down. A Wrecked bi-plane lies on the roof of the building with its occupant not moving. The large storm clouds thunder overhead.

Looking over the ledge connected to the hand is an arm… and more arm… and more arm… and more arm then finally Mr. Fantastic as he ascends the ten story building. Too damp for the human Torch's likings he made it up to investigate solo on the pretty ordinary crash. Probably some farmer who got pushed away by these strange strong winds.

"Any one there?" Mr. Fantastic calls out, striding quickly over to the plane. "I'm here to help! Are you alright?" and he turns the dummy over that is sitting in the cockpit. A pair of green eyes glows behind him…


	11. Chapter 11

"And that is why we must play music at this concert…" finishes Starfire to the Gordonian sentries, who sit with tails coiled, showing that they were interested. She flicks some of her food at the laser wall of the prison, sizzling it and bouncing back into her mouth.

"Earth music is said to be quite pleasant to the Sejassi sector." nods one. "Maybe captain Blackfire will be kind enough to let you perform this task before completion of the mission?"

"Mission?" says Starfire confused.

"It's all pretty simple really." says the other guard (Obviously the two weren't very experienced soldiers). "One, is to test this new ship's ability to subdue a planet, and secondly, more to the benefit of the Captain, to…"

…

Robin starts running to meet up with Cyborg to get a lift back to the tower. From there, thay could figure out the next plan of action. However, he happened to bump into Blackfire along the way.

"YOU?" says Blackfire angrily. "How did you escape my ship?" and she wheels her flying saucer around.

"Same old." he says, feeling for a weapon… then remembering that it was taken again. "Oh rats!"

"Huh! You can't stop me you pitiful Troq!" says Blackfire, moving her ship side to side in mockery. Her tone changes as a tin can hits her head.

"Maybe I'll get lucky and hit the self destruct button?" thinks Robin, throwing another few cans.

"So you want to throw stuff?" says Blackfire, and a tractor beam hits Robin. "Have a spin!"

"I'd rather…" and Robin is spun around like a washing machine cycle and thrown into the air, clearing the buildings…

"Oh Banthas!" says Blackfire. "I was aiming for a window!" she cackles and heads off to find her next victim…

…

"This is bad…" moans Beastboy, covering himself in some kitchen foil in an attempt to block the various sparks whizzing around the place.

"Darn cold…" sniffles Raven, blowing another fog horn. "I can hardly eben undertad by snelf." the microwave gives in and goes out in a bang.

"Have you fixed her that chicken soup yet?" says Cyborg over the link (Which is quite fuzzy)

"This is one beast man who isn't going to chop no chicken!" says the foil covered hero. "I fixed her some imitation chicken soup instead. Made of…"

"Don't say it…"

"Tofu!"

"What a surprise!"

"Wowzers! This cold is contagous! You caught her sarcasm!"

"Berry fuddy." says Raven.

"Did you say you wanted berry fudgy?"

A large zap and yelp follows.

"Just fix her some tea then!" sighs Cyborg. "I'll call back when I see Rob. Over and out!"

"You didn't have to zap me okay!" says Beastboy annoyed and rubbing his rear. "Can't you take a joke?"

"Whad are you dalking aboud?"

"And don't you call me a dork!"

"It wasn't her… It was ME!" says Control freak with a remote in hand. Mumbo also stands next to him. Their shakles free.

"Argh! How did you escape your prison room?" gasps Beastboy.

"It exploded." says CtrlF

"Much like everything else." observes Mumbo. "However, my own little tricks protect our remote from your EMP sneezes that you amply supplied to our glorious benefit."

"How come your sdill wearding your blues brodders gostumes den?" says Raven puzzled more than frightened.

"Somebody put glue on our glasses. And these are the only things that match." says CtrlF. "We're here to find the culprit who thought it was funny."

All eyes turn…

Beastboy sweats a little and twiddles his thumbs. "It was only a joke!" he says quivering a little. "It'll wash off!"

"The trickster also could not tell the difference between the words 'wood' and 'super' on the glue he used it seems." says Mumbo, taking the remote from CtrlF

"Whoops…"

"That isn't the half of it!" says Mumbo. "Have at you!" and he zaps him again.

"Ow!"

"Maybe dis iddn't do bad afder all." says Raven.

…

Mammoth finishes securing Robin to a lamp post with some chains while Jinx mercilessly slaps on the disinfectant on a badly frazzled Gizmo.

"Look. How was I to know he was flying there?" says Robin, not enjoying the feel of the iron links. "Besides, he had a cloaking device on, so I couldn't have seen him anyway."

"What? So we're just going to let you go and warn your friends? Huh!" laughs Jinx. Gizmo screams as more ointment is put on his back.

"Argh!" squeals the short inventor. "I was THIIIS close to finding that spaceship, when this blundering bird of blunder hits me and completely destroys my reconnaissance craft. Lousy, bad for nothing do-gooding sky diver!"

"That's what we Robins do best." says Robin. "Thanks for breaking my fall by the way."

"Oh. You're welcome… NOT! OW!"

"Okay that's the last one." says Jinx.

"Good ha-ha-ha!" says Gizmo rubbing his plastered hands together.

"More emphasis bub!"

"Oh yeah. HA-HA-HAA! How was that?"

"Ace."

"Thanks. Now for some torture!"

"But she said it was the last one." says Mammoth, scratching his head.

"Not me you gonzo goliath, I meant Robin!"

"Um. Can I ask why?" says Robin. "There's nothing you need to know, I don't have anything you want, you can't ask for a ransom cause that always goes bad for you and you guys aren't that type."

"Oh-ho!" smiles Gizmo. "But you're greatly mistaken bozo. We are much MUCH worse!"

"Pass me that purple lipstick Mammoth." says Jinx, already wielding a few hair curlers.

Robin screams. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooo…" But the passing thunder drowns out his pitiful call.

…

"This is but one." says Starfire, cradling a little baby, asleep in her arms. "Where is the other?"

"Under captain's orders, he is in stasis." says the Gordonian. "We thank you for taking care of this human. He was… more than we could handle."

"Why not put this one in stasis then?"

"The power relies on the one child who is in stasis. His power to manipulate the turbines keeps this ship moving without having to go back to Gordonia to refuel. However, the power needed to put THIS child in stasis would require much more strength than the one we have, though his power is truly great."

"This child will need toys soon as custom demands." says Starfire smiling at the baby, wrapped in a red cloak with some red and yellow insignia. "Are there any on board?"

"Few that are stronger than steel. Please keep the child in vision at all times and within the closed cell." he warns. "He's faster than a speeding bullet as well…"

…

"Watch-out! Coming-through! Careful-there! Indicate-man! Hey! That-was-a-red-light! Watch-out-for-that-puddle!" says the Flash as he does a routine rush around his town, speaking in his very Russian way… I mean rushing way.

The storm was pretty sudden, and the dark clouds still menaced the skies, as if waiting for a moment to let rain fall when the people risked venturing from their shelter. Wally didn't mind rain. He moved so fast it dried off him. He was also glad that his shoes could take the slip of the wet pavement, but he slowed 5km anyway to set an example to the drivers.

"Stupid car!" says a girl, kicking at some old banged up beetle. She hops as she injures her toe.

"Need-help-there-miss?" says Flash, winding around the car in a jog (20km/hr). "Wheel-trouble? Engine-trouble? Boy-trouble? Air-conditioning? Windscreen-wipers? Out-of-gas? Battery-flat?"

"Oh. Thankyou." says the girl. "Have a look in the fuel tank."

"Fuel-tank? Okiyl-dokily! What-in-the-world-is…"


	12. Chapter 12

"Sure you don't want to talk about it?" says Cyborg, driving Robin back to the T.

"I'm sure…"

"It's a good thing I saw you then. And a good thing the street was empty."

"…"

"Any plans on how to rescue Star?"

"Formulating…"

"How bout the band?"

"Oswald will have to wait. This is far more important."

"I just hope we're up to fighting off a fully armed, manned, alien warship, AND Blackfire to boot!"

"Once we get up there, I'd be more worried for them."

(Silence)

"There's still some glitter on your nose."

"Shut up…"

…

"Well, that's the last one." says Blackfire, patting her hands together. "Time to say hello to my little sis."

Down in the dark and wet holds of the leviathan of a ship there is strangled screaming as Starfire undergoes something rather horrid… The air is close and the walls seem to move in upon her. Her head spins, and she screams out in terror…

She screams again, backing away trembling, but her legs give way to the horror and inhumanity. She falls and cowers; giving in to the awesome power of the foul mechanism before her. "I AM NOT CHANGING THAT DIAPER!"

"But we Gordonians don't know how to do it!" points out a guard. "And the captain is sure to object. You're the only one who can save us now!"

"What if I instructed you?" says Starfire.

"This uniform costs a bundle! No way!"

The little bundle of joy gurgles and smiles, quite unaware of the devastating smell its little surprise had hence issued.

"I guess it must be done…" sighs Star, and she does it with some caution. "Argh! He's still going!"

"You idiots! Get back to your posts!" says Blackfire, coming down, meeting the guards who were running up. She whiffs in a bit and sympathises rather greenly. "On second thoughts, everyone up until she finishes. Ugh!"

"By the great galactica! It's number 3!"

"RUN!"

…

"Such a primitive device!" says Gizmo, observing the weapons he pinched from Robin. "Any fool can make these!"

"Can you?" says Mammoth. A spanner hits him but he shrugs, stuffing his face with spaghetti which he believes is finger food. (In fact he believes most food is finger food). "What did you pinch J?"

"Nothing much. Just three tickets to their little show!" gloats Jinx, flaring them around. "I heard they sold out too. Lucky for me and the other two I'm willing to drag along!"

"Who are you taking with you?"

"Stupid one and stupid two, who do you think?"

Mammoth ponders "Uhhh…?" It was like watching ice melt in Alaska.

Jinx just holds her head for a few seconds. "Just don't eat too much big guy. We have a party to crash… You'd better free Mr. smarty pants too." she adds, observing Gizmo trapped in ice from tampering too much.

"Ah!" exclaims Mammoth "I know that guy!"

…

"What happened?" says Robin looking at the forms of Mumbo and CtrlF plastered on the wall.

"I sneezed…" mutters Raven. She sneezes again, bowling over the couch. Mumbo and CtrlF twitch involuntarily.

"God bless you." says Cyborg. A lamp explodes.

"God save us!" says Beastboy, wearing football padding all over.

"Dat idn't fuddy!" remarks Raven, and she wilts to her room. The phone rings.

"Hello?" says Robin. It's Oswald. "Ah. It's you… Yeah… That's good, the venue is set… you want us to practice now? Uh… Well, the thing is, Starfire has been kidnapped by aliens, Raven has a cold and I just got mugged… Don't laugh! Listen! I'm not joking! Hello? Hello? Dang! He hung up!"

"Let me have a try!" says BB, dialing the number. "Hello? Uhuh… You don't say! Uhuh.You DON'T say!"

"What did he say?"

"He didn't say."

Cyborg parts them before Robin can fling out a birdarang.

"Fine!" says Robin fed-up. "Me and BB will take blue and fat face to the practice." he says, where he receives a hearty boo from the two suspended villains. "You get the east Titans to help track down Blackfire and we'll leave Raven here under quarantine. Let's go titans!"

…

"You may have saved our lives, but you are STILL my prisoner!" says Blackfire behind the forcefield. She struts around the prison hold, tinkling the key cards. "Very soon my glorious plan will be accomplished, and I, Blackfire shall return to Tamaran invincible!"

"That will never happen sister!" says Starfire, cradling the super baby. "Not while the Titans are here to stop you."

"The titans are nothing!" scoffs Blackfire, twirling her hair. "But other beings on this planet interested me greatly…" and she gives an evil twinkle in her eyes.

"What have you done?" demands Starfire, knowing that look well.

"Well, I have another appointment coming up, so I can't stay to chut…"

"That's chat."

"Whatever. So I'll let your new playmates tell you all about it. Hmm?" and she laughs, switching a lever. "Have a good chut! Hahaha!"

"It's CHAT!" yells Starfire, but Blackfire has already left, leaving her with the baby to face the new arrivals.

A small panel had opened on the side, revealing three menacing figures in the darkness. They were half her height, but they seemed disfigured, but it was hard to tell quite what they were in the shadowy enclosure. One had his arms dragging on the ground and a neck waving long like a cobra. Another had thick bands of metal weighed on his arms and legs, shaking the ground as it stepped heavily. The other looked normal (For a human), aside the fact it was walking on the ceiling.

Quickly laying the baby down behind her, she turns to the 'monsters' and prepares to fight…

…

_When there's trouble you know who to call!  
A caddy!  
Beware of puddles, you have to aim for the hole  
A birdie!_

_When a duck gives you a quack  
Get the clubs and give it a whack  
Cause when your golf is completely out of controool  
Teen Titans GO!_

_Teen Titans GO!  
Teen Titans GO!_

_If your sight is bad we'd better watch out  
Hit too hard and hit a tree  
If your putt is bad, you don't need to shout  
We'll just, give you a gimme  
Give you a gimmeee_

_T-E-E-N! T-I-T-A-N-S! TEEN TITANS! LET'S GO!  
T-E-E-N! T-I-T-A-N-S! TEEN TITANS! LET'S GO!  
T-E-E-N! T-I-T-A-N-S! TEEN TITANS! LET'S GO!  
T-E-E-N! T-I-T-A-N-S! TEEN TITANS! LET'S GO!_

_Teen Titans GO!  
Teen Titans GO!_

_When there's trouble you know who to call  
Golf buggy!  
If it rains, you know it usually pours  
I'm soggy!  
When your ball lands in a sand trap  
Do not fret, cause we've got your back  
Cuz when the world needs heroes at the hole  
Teen Titans GO!_

_One, two, three, four, GO!  
Teen Titans!_

"We are NOT taking you to the golf tournament!" shouts Cyborg. "Do you think you're out of custody already?"

"We can dream!" mumbles Mumbo. "I wouldn't mind a quick swing…"

"I'm pretty close to giving you one, so just belt up back there already!"

…

"Well that was easy!" says Blackfire dusting her hands. "A living magnet in my ship and with super speed, super sense, super stretch, super strength and now, super smart in my hands, the world is mine! And all those other aliens have problems invading this rock? What nafbloggs!" and she walks on, towing behind her in chains… a young boy in a bat suit…


End file.
